At my brother s wedding I was the best man. One of the best man’s duties is to give a toast during the reception. Despite being something of a non-tradiitonal I held true to traiditon and gave a toast. I don’t know if the toast was good or bad, or somewhere in between. I think my brother and his Bride understood what it was I was trying to say. That is really another discussion. Whats been on my mind is something someone said afterwards. I think it was my mother but now I’m not sure. What they said was “He’s going to be a preacher someday”.
This is something that has sort of followed me all my life. My family is made up largely of Methodist ministers. There’s been one just about every generation or every other generation since sometime in the 1500’s. Thats a lot to live up to.
Now there has never been any pressure on my to follow this road. None really, which surprises people since my Mom, Dad, and Grandfather answered the call. But it is something that has haunted me my entire life. People have been saying I should be a preacher all my life in a sort of suggestion way.
But I have not been called. Not that I know of anyway. I’ve never been called to anything that I know for certain. I talk to folks who know exactly what they want to do with there lives. There is a certainty there. Every preacher I have ever talked to about it simply knew. They knew that they were called. Sometimes I wonder if my call came and I just missed it. I don’t know. When Bob Dylan sings “How does it feel, to be a rolling stone, no direction home”, I know how he feels.
I know that I want to help people, that I want to do something that benefits humanity. Even if it is something as simple and helping kids discover new music or books, or whatever. But I have not heard my call yet. I just hope I haven’t missed it.